A few weeks ago, I wrote about casual relationships and how so many people don’t recognise that they’re in one because they see the hallmarks of a relationship, such as being together over a period of time, sleeping together, being introduced to others etc, but they don’t recognise that there are crucial landmarks missing such as commitment, consistency, intimacy, progression and balance.
One of the biggest sources of angst from readers is the whole question of starting over, dating again, trusting again, and ultimately knowing if they’re ready for a relationship/to start dating again.
What I find particularly interesting is that while the minority will avoid dating and attempting to forge connections with other people while they are hurting/rebuilding, the majority of people I come across are eager to restart even if it is patently clear that they are not over their ex or are just not emotionally ready to date.
This is why there are so many casual relationships masquerading as full on relationships: Because too many people don’t want to do the emotional work and take enough time to heal from previous relationships and/or get themselves emotionally ready.
The break up may have been terrible, but every break up leaves a little crack that longs to be whole again.
This is especially true in a relationship that ends abruptly.
I don’t want to break off a good relationship to go on a date with the new person, only to find that we don’t have much in common.
In most cases, the intense affection and lost love may cloud your judgment and make you believe you’re ready to fall in love with an ex again. Read should you date an ex to find out if you’re truly ready.
Once you’re certain that you’re ready to take a plunge into the same waters again, this is what you need to do. Losing a relationship has its gains Losing your ex to someone else or to circumstances can help both of you really understand how much both of you mean to each other.
By dating an ex again and falling back in love, you can learn from your past errors and make sure the same mistakes never happen again.
When two exes really love each other and truly understand where they went wrong the first time around, it can actually help build a stronger and happier foundation to a perfect relationship.